Say you’re at the club, and your lover sees a person that they’ve wanted to go around with, for a month or more. The only reason they haven’t is because you dislike the other person in that relationship to the extent that you don’t want to have sex with them. Unfortunately, that’s a deal breaker for the person in whom your lover is interested.
What do you do?
Consider: What Don’t You Like?
Is it their personality? If it is, does it really matter in bed? If it is a matter of not being visually attracted then you may close your eyes and imagine someone else. On the other hand, if it’s something less avoidable, like their voice, you can’t really ask them to keep quiet during sex. If it’s about how they smell, then you really have a problem. Ultimately, you have to figure out just how bad the dislike is. Are they someone you want to send off to do the Running of the Bulls? Or is it more like you’d leave them behind if the boat was leaving Gilligan’s island? There’s a huge difference between the two, and only you can figure this out.
The Mature Approach: Suck It Up
You’re an adult and we hope you want your lover to be happy. There’s no point being with them if you want them to be unhappy. If you want them to be happy, and having sex with the person they’re interested in would make them happy, then grow up, grit your teeth, and agree to be with the person even if you’re not interested. If you’re lucky, then they’ll turn you down. (Of course, then you’re stuck wondering what it is they didn’t like about you, and that would suck. So maybe they’ll take you up on it, and that’s the actual lucky situation). And if they don’t, then do your best to have some fun and give them a good time.
The Immature Approach: Me Me Me
A less mature person would tell their lover, yet again, that you don’t want to swing with that couple. Your lover’s eventually going to ask you why, and you’re going to reveal yourself to be a child when you say something like, “He smells funny!” Your lover won’t be impressed by that, even if they know how much smell can get to you. It probably won’t be a deal breaker for them, but it won’t be a picnic for either of you while you work through the fact that your lover can’t sleep with someone because you won’t get over a scent issue.
The Third Option
If you’re very lucky, there can be a situation where someone else has been checking out the person you don’t like, and you know their lover doesn’t want to be with the person your lover wants. That couple won’t split up, either. Now you can finagle a three-way split here: your lover with the person they want; the person you don’t want with the person who wants them; and you and the remaining person. Hopefully, you can tolerate this person. Otherwise, get nose plugs.