Swinging is one of those things that you are either going to be really into or really not. I got into the scene about 5 years ago and realized that I’m one of those who are really into it. I was lucky because when I started swinging I was completely clueless. I went into the whole party scene with a lot of preconceived notions and too many HBO Features on my brain. Once I learned what was up, I also learned a few things about myself.
What I Thought Was Hot Isn’t
I’m what I consider to be an All American Dude. You know, wings and a beer kind of guy who likes my women with thin legs, huge boobs, long hair, and a tight ass. That sort of chick is rare in swinging communities. But as I got going I realized that the typical ″babe″ was not my type at all. I was convinced that the best way to succeed as a swinger was to nail as many supermodels as possible. But the first time I went out of the box, it blew my mind.
She had short hair and a massive tattoo on her arm. She was short in height with thick legs and a big butt. I didn’t even think that I’d want to talk to her before she sat down next to me. She was very confident and before I knew it, we were partying in one of the private rooms. That night changed my idea of what I thought was sexy.
What My Limits Are
Marathon sex matches and parties with more than three couples are just not my thing. I also learned exactly how much kink I can handle before I tap out. The funny thing about learning those limits and admitting them was that it felt good to do it.
When someone has boundaries it’s up to everyone else to respect them. Saying what you aren’t into isn’t a sign of being a prude and I was the only one in my group who seemed to think like that. Dudes are so programmed to always be ready for sex that the idea that I could say no was an eye opener for me. I got a lot more comfortable when I realized that I didn’t always have to be ″on″.
How to Not be so Serious
I’m a young dude; I have a habit of taking myself too seriously. Or I did, before I started swinging. Being nervous when I started out, I made some embarrassing mistakes in my first two parties. The thing that stuck me was to see how everyone was chilling around. People make mistakes and sometimes funny things happen when you’re hot and heavy in a group. It’s okay to laugh at yourself.
I think I’ve grown up a lot in the past 5 years. I definitely learned a lot about myself that’s made me more confident. Being able to relax has made my private life take off like you wouldn’t believe. I’ve also been able to keep the same attitude about my professional life as my swinging one. I’m not looking to stop partying anytime soon.